Welcome to Day 3 of our Journey through “31 Days to Bless Your Family”!
Today’s theme is Communication. When I was a kid (in the 1970’s) I learned the top three reasons for divorce were Sex, Finances, and Communication. According to a November 2017 article in Marriage.com, “Top 10 Reasons for Divorce“, they still are and in the same order!
I engrained the list in my head because my parents were divorced when I was a baby, it was never a healthy situation for me in my own experience, and it was important to me to have a family when I grew up that would be different. If you read yesterday’s post, you would already know that didn’t work out in my first marriage. And yes, you guessed it, Communication was a huge factor. I also know it is a huge factor in the blessing of my second marriage, and the peace and love and joy that fills our home.
Types of Communication That Lead to Blessing:
Communication either opens every possibility or it shuts it down. There is a lot that goes into communication that produces positive results in varied situations, and it is one more reason why we need to be committed to the process of learning, growing, and finding new ways to be better.
I wrote the list above out of my own experience in blessing my family. I have always believed in being honest, in full transparency. Before I remarried I shared “the good, the bad, and the ugly” of my contributions to my first marriage, who I had been, who I had become then, and who I wanted to still grow into. I was also authentic in communicating my goals and vision for my own future, and a future together. The good news, obviously, is none of that scared away the woman I would be blessed to marry three years later.
Communicating wasn’t always easy or perfect for us but we found our place together in our courtship. We learned to honor one another, each other’s differences and independence, and the necessary time to grow together. We honored our agreements and the direction for creating a home and family, and we grew in our respect and admiration and trust for each other because of it. We learned to protect our love together through tender and sweet communication. It has been fourteen years and we are still that couple that can make you wonderfully sick watching us be lovey and sweet together. I can honestly tell you we have had only one fight in the past eleven years. When there is conflict or tension our oneness and our tenderness together keeps things from erupting. We both make conscious efforts not to escalate anything, and we can typically get back on the same page pretty quickly.
This has been a positive example for my son who is from my first marriage. I wrote in Day 1 – Getting Started about some of the blessings he receives with our family. Every blessing we have together is possible in part or whole because of communication. The love, peace, and joy we tend to have together creates an environment that makes it possible to then communicate edifying and faithful messages. In my opinion, the foundations of communication above have to be present and trustworthy before you can effectively then “build-up” the members of your family. They certainly need to be present in order to demonstrate and communicate faith-filled messages. These are messages, even in tough and unsure times, which allows you to consistently express unconditional love, resolve conflict, ask for forgiveness, restore peace, instill hope, and inspire faith.
What About You?
What can you do to Bless Your Family through improved Communication? What else can you learn or add to this post to accomplish more of what you want in your own family?
[shareable cite=”Eric D. Jackson”]Communication either opens every possibility or it shuts it down.[/shareable]
Today’s “Dares and Prayers” shared in the video:
Love Dare – “not Selfish“
Love Dare For Parents – “Kind“
Power of a Praying Husband, Pray for – “Her Emotions“
Resolution – “Lifelong Vision of Fatherhood“
31 Days of Building Your Family Values, Bible App Devotions – “Margin”
building in “margin” is one way to “clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience”
allow yourself more margin in and for and around your family
protect that margin (future topic, Day 19)
Daily Resources and References
Please review the Welcome to 31 Days to Bless Your Family post if you missed it. There are some starting resources and recommendations there. Your best resource will be a local Bible teaching church to plug into with your family, and be surrounded by a thriving and supportive community.